EPISODE GUIDE SEASON 2

Kryten:

Rimmer's donned his best uniform and Lister's put on his smelly orange moon boots, even Holly's wearing a toupee...after all, what self respecting smeg head could possibly resist a cry for help from three damsels and an android in distress? The crew discover that the Nova V's female crew are decidedly skeletal, Lister nudges Rimmer: "I think the blonde one's giving you the eye." Lister discovers Kryten's been doing his laundry: "No way are these my boxer shorts - these bend!" Kryten steps back from his Rimmer portrait to reveal a painting of Arnie on the bog. He's rebelling. "What are you rebelling against?" Asks Rimmer. "Whatta ya got?" Kryten replies in his best Brando brogue.

Better Than Life:

It's cool! It's wild! It's Better Than Life - the new game sensation sweeping the solar system. Just dream and pleasure will be yours! Unless you have a mind like Rimmer's that is... The Cat's hungry, but Lister informs him that Rimmer's father has died. The Cat considers, "Well I'd prefer chicken."

Thanks For The Memory:

Rimmer's depressed - no one loves him. Not even his fried egg, chutney and chilli sauce sandwich. It's about time he had a damp dream at least. Then four days go missing and Lister and Cat wake up with their legs in plaster...Have the aliens landed at last? Rimmer explains how an alien communicates by breaking legs and doing jig-saws. "I wouldn't like to be around when one of these suckers is making a speech!" responds the Cat.

Stasis Leak:

The crew of Red Dwarf have found a way to go back in time three million years. Back to the freaky fungus and the luscious Kochanski - the two loves of Lister's life. Who knows? Rimmer could even find Rimmer before he dies and bring him back so he doesn't have to be dead anymore. Holly explains the episode title, "A stasis leak is a leak, right, in stasis. Hence the name 'a stasis leak.'" Lister discovers the secret love letters Rimmer wrote to Carol McCauley. "Your eyes are like two limpid pools of loveliness, your hair is like a golden waterfall. Plus those short skirts you wear make me really horny." The Cat is baffled by the stasis leak: "What is it?" he asks. Rimmer explains that it's a rent in the space-time continuum. Cat asks, "What is it?" again. Three more times. Until it's finally put it into words he can comprehend: "Oh, a magic door. Well why didn't you say?" The Cat looks down at a naked man in the shower: "Don't worry - it's personality that counts."

Queeg:

Holly's been deposed and the backup computer Queeg 500 is in control of the Red Dwarf. Will Lister and Cat lead a revolt after they've cleaned the corridor floors? Will Rimmer's legs ever be the same again after Queeg's fitness regime? Has Holly got something up his sleeves? Would he know where to look if he had sleeves anyway? Under Holly's direction Lister joins two cables and is blown away by an explosion. "Or was it the white cable..." Holly wonders aloud. Forced to scrub the floor, the Cat explains why he cannot wear the rubber gloves provided: "Marigold with blue, are you crazy?!" Holly emerges from his Queeg disguise to surprised glares: "We are talking April, May, June, July and August fool," he chuckles.

Parallel Universe:

Climb aboard Holly's new "hop drive" and journey into a parallel universe where everything exists exactly the same but opposite. Imagine the horror of a female Rimmer and a pregnant Lister... The crew do a song and dance number, 'Tongue Tied,' to start the show. The Cat really does have some weird dreams. Lister is discovered by the Rimmers to have slept with his female self. And what with this being a parallel universe, "You could very well, possibly, be up the duff, laddie," Rimmer gloats.

SEASON 3

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